Safe Luxury - what was it like after your delivery when you took your baby home?

what was it like after your delivery when you took your baby home?

I know it's probably a silly question, but I'm in the beginning of my third trimester (first pregnancy) and was wondering what could the first few days/nights of having the baby home would consist of. Were you so tired/sore that you couldn't move? Was your baby incredibly responsive to you (your voice, ect)? Did they appear to be happy, hyper, bouncy, eager to be with you all the time? Sorry for so many questions within a question. I'm just curious and very excited. I heard that newborns and babies in general don't sleep much and that they shouldn't sleep on their backs because of risk of SIDS. How did you keep your little ones from laying on their backs? Do you have a technique? A friend of mine had her baby sleep with her in bed, is that really safe? I have the book What To Expect When You're Expecting and it's been very helpful during this pregnancy, but I'd like to hear what everyone else has to say too. Thank you so much in advance!

Public Comments

you will have a motherly instinct that will kick in and it will all come natural, the baby should sleep alot the first few weeks to take time to rest you are going to need it later!!!!
It was really hectic once I got my daughter home. She hated all noise!We had to unplug the phone!! And you get very little sleep because you have to feed every 3 hours. My daughter mostly cried at first and smiled a little in her sleep. And babies Should only sleep on their backs sleeping on their stomach or side can cause SIDS. pacifiers are now said to help prevent SIDS. I sleep with my daughter but I do not advise you to do this if you are a heavy sleeper because you can roll over on them and smother them but most mothers I know say that they automatically wake up if they are too close to their baby. I guess it is a Mommy thing.But it is very hard to break them from sleeping with you once you start !! my daughter is 7 months and still sleeps with us.
First of all, they ARE supposed to sleep on their backs. As far as how you will feel all depends on what kind of delivery you have. My first to were vaginal, and I was perfectly fine when I went home the next day. But, I did not tear nor get cut down there, if you do you will be sore. I just had a c-section on May 1st and I was in horrible pain for almost a week. It is hard to get out of bed, roll over, bend, etc... Your baby will probably keep you up most of its first night home. The first night is always the hardest, but then it isn't bad. Baby normally will only sleep two hours at time. Your baby will recognize your voice and may even turn head towards it. Just don't worry too much, things will come to you. Just keep a positive attitude, and don't forget that you can ask for help. Best of Luck to you.
i agree with the answer above, your motherly instincts will totally come in. also, it'd be helpful if you purchased the book "what to expect the first year" .. that has been my bible throughout my son's first year (now two) and now my daughter (10 months). don't worry, you're going to be fine. i never had my mother around, she lives ina different state so it was all up to me and thank goodness for my husband. i'm 25 with two babies (and another on the way) .. hey, if i can do it, anybody can.
It's hectic, the first few months were a blur. Just remember that it will be a learning experience. I just think that it's not all that it's painted to be. Be prepared for your hormones to be out of whack as well, I was a mess the first week. I will never forget the first time I saw my son and held him. Also it's the other way around with sids, they are not supposed to sleep on their tummies. Keep in mind, everyone has their own experience just like you will. Congrats and enjoy! The time flys once they are born!
You want your baby on their back. On there back reduces the risk of SIDS. When baby's are first born they cant roll over, not until 4 months or so. Its not recommend for the baby to sleep in the bed with you just because of the risk of rolling over the baby, falling off the bed, or being suffocated with pillows or blankets. A bassinet by the bed might be a better idea if you are worried about that. The first few days you never know what to expect, I was so tired but on an adrenal high that I didn't notice. Just really make sure you sleep when the baby is sleeping, you wont think this is good advice but trust me on it. good luck mother hood is so much fun
THe first day or two home I thought I had this perfect baby that slept alot. Then, it got hard. He was really fussy tho and ate every 1hr and a half or so. I had a 4th degree episiotomy and a uterine repair right after and I was single with no help, but I don't remember alot of pain. I think you are so busy with the baby. The worst to me was when the lack of sleep caught up with me. But, I have to say, something kicks in and you are able to muster the strength to keep on keepin' on. My son didn't have a personality then ( he has since made up for it ).He was always crying,eating, poopin or sleeping for the first several wks. But, I still remember picking out his little outfits with coordinating shoes, giving him baths and how sweet he smelled.I also remember how I just glided like Gumby when someone would go, "Awwww! He's so cute !!" It was a feeling I had never felt before or since. THe first few nights aren't great, but they pass quickly. Mine was a blur.I love first time moms. Everything is so new and cool and I remember it so clearly. Sincere congratulations ! I hope you and your baby have an easy go of it. BEst of luck !
Go get the book what to expect the first year, it will be a help for the first year and answer some of your questions. You can also get Baby 411, which is a good book of first year answers. Other parts of your question can only be answered by your baby. However, here is my experience: When we brought our baby home I was still somewhat on the adrenaline rush from having her, and this was 4 days later. Newborns sleep allot! I don't know where you got your information from but newborns sleep allot, and my baby could sleep anywhere! I would put her on the floor to play with her and next thing I knew she would be asleep! Then I would just watch her sleep! The saying that all a newborn does is eat sleep and poop was pretty true of my little one. As far as my tiredness or soreness, I have a high tolerance for pain, and I had had a c-section but I was fine for the most part. They gave me plenty of medication to help any pain I may have been having. I would not say any newborn is responsive to anything other than their food, which at that time was me, so I guess she was responsive to me. You need to find some newborns and see what they are like, it sounds mean, but they are little hungry pooping potato sacks! They become more responsive and interactive around 3 months (that's the ones that you see on tv as "newborns") The SIDs risk is sleeping on their stomach not their back. And you just lay the child on their back to sleep, they can't roll so no problem about their changing their position. Remember Back to Sleep! As far as sleeping in your bed, I swore I would never do it, but when she was hungry and I got her out of the bassinet and laid her beside me to eat next thing I knew is it was about 2 hours later and she wanted more so we switched sides and she ate again while I slept again. As far as safety, no it's not really safe, but parents do it, they even make little "beds" called co-sleepers for your baby to be in within your bed. Good luck!!
hi and congrats! be excited its a very exciting time for you. Well i can tell you how i felt. My first child was a c-section so yes i was very sore and tired, it was difficult to lift and move around but i still did every thing i got my husband to help when able to but i breast fed so i got up every 2 hours. Now i tried to put my son into the crib but it didnt work very well. he loved to cuddle and i was so bloody tired that i ended up falling asleep in bed with him half the time. i used a pillow to prop him up while i fed. So soon enough i just let him sleep with me..rolled over to feed him when he needed it and barely awake i still tried to burp him lol. He turned out fine. Its mothers intuition so you never roll on top of your baby.. I just have a 5 week old this time i did the natural labour tho i did use an epidural cos man it was 18 hours of labour and all i can say is thank god for drugs!! i had 3rd degree tear so i was in some pain..but nothing too bad. the first 2 days i was very tired..but after that it wasn't so bad. this one is a cuddler..but he does sleep in his bassinet. I do have nights where i am extremely tired (having 2 children is so much tiring than just one child) so sometimes fall asleep with him in my bed..but for the most part try and have the baby sleep in a bassinet or crib in your room with you; for the reason of SIDS is a possibility or the fact that when they are older they always want to sleep with you..which is what i'm having a problem with my 2 year old right now!! it is ok to sleep with your child just not recommended.(apparently) i enjoy sleeping with my boys to be honest. Anyways good luck..enjoy your time being a mom is i swear the best thing that happend to me.. i want 10 children if i could...best thing you can do is just love your baby; eat right, and take care of YOURSELF as well as your baby. /hugs
My baby slept so much the first few weeks I think she was only awake for a couple hours a day. When she was awake she was either crying or looking blankly. They don't get interactive until later. I was very tired even though I had a very good little sleeper. I slept with my baby in bed with me and I still do. She is ten months old. I believe that this is the safest way to sleep (unless you are a very heavy sleeper and thrash around a lot). If you think about how we lived for thousands and thousands of years in tribes it was only natural to sleep right next to our babies. I also read the book "What to Expect When You're Expecting" and "What to Expect The First Year." I do NOT recommend "What to Expect the First Year." It has very outdated information in it especially on introducing solids. I liked Dr. Sears "The Baby Book." He also has some other very informative baby and child related books that are worth checking out.
Hmm, bringing baby home is actually very relieving. Both of my babies were "good" babies. Mine slept most of the time. I was tired until a week or two into it. You'll probably have this rush of energy for the first week and then you'll begin to get tired. When you first get home with baby, you'll be wanting to do things when you should be napping when baby does. There's nothing wrong with that of course, it's just what we do. The tiredness comes in the a.m. When baby keeps waking to eat, bottle or breast, it will catch up with you. Newborns usually sleep 23 hours of the day!! They don't do much cooing or moving or anything really. They just cry when they're hungry. As far as sleeping, I never, ever put mine on their bellys. I always put them on their backs. I don't care what anyone says. On their belly, I was afraid their mouth would get covered somehow and they wouldn't be able to move it to where they can breath....they don't realize how to stop that from happening.. On their back, their mouth is fully open to air. The only worry I had was them spitting up while on their back. My second child done that when she was only a few days old and it scared me to death but it only happened that one time. I still put her on her back. Passy's are good for baby's who sleep on their belly. They help to provide an "air canal" between the nose and bed and the mouth and passy. I've seen those sleep positioners that allows you to put your baby on it's side. I think those would be great. One thing too, and ALL mothers do this...lol If you wake up on your own no matter what time it is in the night, you will jump up like your feet are on fire to check on that baby. You will be in a panic thinking "OMG, why hasn't he woke up yet!!" But it's just something we do. lol We worry and I know I have nudged both of my babies many times in the night to make sure they were alive!! It's silly but we all do it. As far as sleeping in the bed, I see nothing wrong with it if it's just you and the baby. Also, be sure the space between the mattress and the headboard is not big. The baby can work it's way up to that space and if it's big enough they could get stuck or even go through it. If you are worried about that just put a pillow normally on the bed, and put baby below the pillow. Put another pillow on the side in case of rolling.. Even though they can't roll, anything is possible. Otherwise, just enjoy this time. Rock the baby, hold the baby, watch the baby, show off the baby... it will sleep and eat and that's about it. Some advice.... Don't keep it too quiet. I never did and mine can sleep through anything. I don't have to worry about "waking baby up". I have a family member that kept it super quiet, and the slightest noise woke hers up... and when hers was awaken like that she was very ill.
I wasn't going to answer this question but I don't think anyone else mentioned this...the first two days I had my baby he wore every onesie he had. We would change his shirt every time he spit up. We were worried about him staying dry and I think we just wanted to see him in everything. So you will probably be changing a lot of shirts. Before I had the baby I was worried about who was going to do the dishes, when I got home I felt good enough to wash dishes. So I guess it wasn't that bad. Also babies eat about every 2 hours but no one told me that in order to get some sleep you can let them sleep for about 5 hours without waking them up for a feeding but don't go longer than that.
I found the scary part to be when I looked at her, I realized how difficult life would be because I was now wearing my heart on the outside. But so exciting! what a wonderful time! Just like every biological organism. your instincts will kick in and tell you the right things to do. Dont ignore them! Dont listen to peoples advice for 6 weeks after your baby is born. Particluarly about things like baby training, (put that baby down so he gets used to it, its ok to let that baby cry, feeding schedule, dont rock the baby etc...) Tell them that if you have a question, you will ask, so that you learn to trust yourself. When you have your baby you will want to hold him 24/7.. go for it! you cant spoil him! You will feel an incredible (biological response and hormonal) need to run to him everytime her cries, go for it! crying is a survival tool for an infant, it doesnt develop his lungs, he doesnt know how to manipulate, babies dont "need to cry" Studies show that if you let him cry, he will only cry longer and harder because he feels that he needs to do this to get your attention, or give up because no one is responding and lose trust in you. Just hold him and stare at him for hours and enjoy every minute of it. ADDED: It was mentioned not to sleep with your baby because of safety issue, I also sleep with my 10 month old and will until she is two years old. I am a believer in attachment parenting. 4,500 babies a year die of SIDS in cribs, and only 60 a year die in thier parents bed of suffocation. Dr. Sears feels that sleeping with your baby REDUCES the risk of SIDS. I understand that it will be difficult to get her out of my bed, it will be difficult to get her out of diapers, wean her from the breast and many things worthwhile, I am more concerned about her safety than making her easier to care for :) http://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/T102100.asp
Oh, I miss having a newborn. My 3rd and last baby is already 15mos. old. With all of my kids, the first day I brought them home I was nervous but excited. I was happy to be home. Yes, I was sore. They slept a lot until that night. All 3 of my kids were up a lot their first night home. They really seem to wake up on the 3rd day after birth. It's wonderful yet exhausting. When your milk comes in, expect to be sore and feel a little feverish. Sleep when the baby sleeps and make sure you have help. Oh, by the way, your baby should ALWAYS be put to sleep on his/her BACK. You had it the other way around. I kept my baby in there bassinet for as long as they fit, but they all wound up sleeping with me. Just be careful. Go to the Doctor Sears website and read about co-sleeping. Your maternal instincts will kick in, don't worry. I wish you all the best!
First off, try to have someone you're comfortable with stay with you for the first 3-4 days after coming home. You won't feel like doing much other than staring at your little one and tending to their needs. Most newborns sleep lots for the first week or so. They're so worn out. But you should still wake them every 3 hours for a feeding. (I suggest the Baby Whisperer book - it has made being a mom so easy - and our 10 month old is so predictable & easy to take care of because I read that book.) If you start early on getting your baby on a routine, your whole family will be happier. I was tired, and a little sore from the c-section, but was done with the pain meds w/in a week. My recommendation for if you have surgery - stay in the hospital as long as you can and relax! You'll still be taking care of the baby, but you will have the nurse's help. It's your time to recuperate, really. If you have to turn away visitors, do so (especially on day 2). When you get home, let your little one sleep in a bassinet separate from your bed, but close by so you don't have to trek across the house. If you're nursing, the middle of the night feedings will be easy. Just feed for 45 minutes, change the nappy, and then rock back to sleep and back to the bassinet. Sleep your baby on his/her back (sometimes side if you have a positioner). Most newborns feel like they're falling if they're on their back - so it helps to rock them sideways and lay them down sideways (w/ a rolled blanket front and back at their belly-just remember, if something is blocking their mouth and nose, they can't move it.) Don't let your baby sleep in your bed. Please. Think about when they're 3 or 5 years old...do you want them to still be sleeping with you? No, I recommend starting out as you intend to continue on. From day 1 you're teaching your baby - do it right. A nap together in the recliner occasionally is ok, but I wouldn't make a habit of it. Co-sleeping is not safe. If you get your baby on a good schedule, you can get them to sleep through the night at about 10 weeks and move them to their own room then. Then you don't have to worry about waking them up with every little noise you make in your sleep. And you don't have to worry about them falling off the bed or waking up in the middle of the night wanting to play because they see you. OK, that was long, but I hope it helps! :-D
Well, considering my first baby is now 17, and my baby is 13--things have changed a bit. Every baby is different though, my son had his days and nights mixed up, so he was up all night long. Each delivery is different too--my daughter's was easy, I hemorraged with my son and still felt like I had been hit by a truck even a week post partum. The best piece of advise I can give you is to give yourself time to heal, and sleep when your baby is sleeping. Don't try to do too much too fast--listen to your body. After a couple of weeks, you'll start to think that since the baby's asleep, it's an ideal time to get some chores done...DON'T DO IT!! Also, hopefully you have friends and/or family who will bring meals in for the first week or so after you're home--you might ask your closest friend to hold off until about 2 or 3 weeks post partum--THAT'S when you'll need something. If you don't have someone you feel comfortable asking that--then put some stuff in the freezer now. What I did when my babies were newborns is keep them in the room with me, but in a bassinette--one of those travel cribs works great too--try to get the kind that you can have the mattress part higher so you don't lean down so much to get the baby. And...when my babies were newborns, they slept on their tummies--which is a HUGE no-no today. I loved those little potato sack sleepers for newborns though--great for those bleary eyed, midnight diaper changes. Just enjoy that precious little one. One day, you'll be on here, reading a question from a soon to be new mom, while your high school senior runs in the house to grab some stuff on her way to spend the night at her girlfriend's house, and you'll wonder where all the time went. So enjoy that baby while he/she is still a baby--it goes by all too fast!
When i took my daughter home from the hospital it wa Christmas day and she was only born the day before so i was extremely sore and we went visiting from my family to my husbands family and we were very tired. When we finally got home she slept for awhile but wanted to nurse every 2 hours. AND BABIES SHOULD SLEEP ON THEIR BACKS NOT ON THEIR TUMMIES!!! and do not use bumper pads because they also increase SIDS. You will know what to do but one piece of advice do not wake her/him... unless it has been along time since she ate but other than that do not wake her/him. i heard this saying.. you would not wake your second child so do not wake your first.. good luck once you see your child you will know what to do mother instincts will pop out of nowhere, they did for me.
i had a c-section with my daughter almost 3 weeks ago. in the hospital i got barely any sleep with all the nurses coming in and making sure i was feeding her and checking up on us. you learn that being discreet is pointless in there. i couldn't even breastfeed without somebody walking in my room. it was really stressing. the following day i was in pain and it was somewhat tolerable since i had a support band which helped me the first week. once i was home it seemed like i was much better. some moevements made it feel like my incision wanted to bust open but it was fine. once at home i seemed to be getting better and able to move around alot better. a nurse stopped by to check up on us and told me i should supplement formula along with breastfeeding. i felt guilty about that. and due to some problems on my end about breastfeeding i felt inadequate and that i wasn't properly made to breastfeed a baby. but after awhile i stopped the nipple shield and started pumping exclusively. as far as my baby goes shes as calm as can be except for when it comes to feeding time. she gets restless but never in a crying fit. just expect to sleep when your baby does. its the only way you will survive and feel your best physically and mentally. and keep baby on their back when they are asleep. and my one tip of advice, if you will be having guests over that will spend the night try to keep it to people you feel you will not have to entertain. trying to take care of a newborn and feeling like you need to entertain house guests do not go hand in hand. it will make you resentful if anything. my brother in law and his wife were over for 2 days and it was hell. i had an emotional break down the last night, but they don't know that.
newborn babies sleep on adverage 20 hours a day, so enjoy it. you may have heard wrong but it is much safer to sleep a baby on their back. co sleeping is fine aslong as you take precautions like no heavy blankets and make sure your not intoxicated. you can also bye little beds that go on your bed for the baby. the first few nights are exciting and a bit scary at the same time. because they feed constantly you may not get big chunks of sleep. depending on your labor ( vaginal or cesarean) just take it easy, dont have any set ideas about how you want it to go just let your baby take the lead for the first few weeks. no need to rush giving baby a bath, a warm cloth will do the job.enjoy the time they are asleep to admire the facial expression and little noises, i couldnt help myself to play with their little fingers and toes. you will find you can watch them for hours and just be facinated about how perfectly miniture they are. good luck my love, its a whole new world for you now, just remember to relax and soak up every moment because they will never be that little again.